Sorry for being not here. I mean, sure it doesn't matter to some people but it matters to me. I had always said to myself, I will not let this blog die, no matter what. Not even God himself could stop me, unless he asked me out on a date or something. That would be awesome. hint hint.

It's snowing outside

I've been busy. So many things. Not enough energy to write about. But I will give you the link to my photoblog. Yeah, it may seem like I'm having an affair with blipfoto.com but really, blogger.com knows that its my baby. I'm trying out that one-a-day photoblogging trend. Hopefully I won't run out of ideas of pictures.

It's snowing outside.

Enjoy - Blipfoto :: Ready? Set...Take off!

So I just discovered that I am feeling more and more apathetic to issues that I think I should care more about. For example, it started with my dismissal of the HRC's consumer guide that apparently rates companies on a scale from 0-100% on their support of LGBTQ issues. I had a problem with it because I had no way of knowing how the HRC rated each company, there was no criteria. Just a bunch of numbers and that should be enough to sway me away from X company for Y company. And it didn't help that the sponsors also got high ratings.

Then it also hit me today when I received a Facebook message from a campus Vietnamese association or something about a movie coming out. And before I even opened the message I just thought to myself, "Not another movie about the Vietnam War." When I actually did read the message, I even got more apathetic. Its called something like "After the Fall" or something. And the description was "A new movie filmed from a truly Vietnamese perspective something-something." Okay, great. Another movie about the same thing, but this time its more authentic because its made by a Vietnamese student.

And I'm kind of afraid of this looming cloud of apathy because of my position. Aside from my officer post for a LGBTQ club and everything, I feel as if I should care since no one else does. But I just can't bring myself to care.

Or maybe its not apathy but more "pissed off". Like I feel like arguing. That could be it too. It could be from my mother. She argues well.

This is going to be a rant and its either (or both) is going to be offensive and/or nonsensical. Just saying.

So I was e-mail corresponding with this guy way back a few months ago and just recently he started to e-mail me again. And I can't help but notice that on his signature - the little blurb at the end of his e-mails - says something like, "And always remember to embrace the power of love" or something like that.

Is it just me or is that totally lame? I mean, its one thing to sound eloquent or thoughtful or whatever but its another thing to sound fake. Its like putting two nice words together to get something super nice. And what does "embrace the power of love" really mean? Grab someone's dick? Giving someone a super hug? It's just this touchy feely mentality. Seriously, are we supposed to believe that you're actually telling us to "embrace the power of love" in our everyday lives? That's Dr. Phil's job - to some corny and Hallmark-y.

So I'm leaving for the western portion of our nation tomorrow, specifically CA. But before I do, I just want to jot down some of my thoughts of this past week.

My birthday was the Wednesday of this week. I spent three days - Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday - in the company of my boyfriend Chris. And I'm not really sure what to say. Needless to say I had a great time with him. And I learned so many things about him. Like how if the light hits his eyes a certain way, those dull brown eyes of his look spectacular. Or those little bumps on his stomach which he claims are not abs. Or how his feet and legs are so hairy it reminds me of Pan.

And I found out a few things about me too. Like how clingy I am but also how clingy I was. When I was with Matt or even with Colin, I was so clingy. I wanted to see them, touch them all the time and I found it hard to not be with them. But, I guess mostly due to Colin, I felt some sort of growth inside me that matured me and slapped me upside the head. I learned to lessen my grip a little. And it has helped me greatly in my relationship with Chris. I mean, it's never possible to see someone 24/7 even if you're living with them. Everyone needs some space. But when I find that I haven't seen Chris online in a few days (he's usually on everyday) I do get a little nervous but I don't necessarily freak out about it. Which is what I would be doing if it were about a year ago. Now, I know that he's busy and we'll chat some other time. I know that he's mine and I'm his, etc.

With this being said, the past few days was an overdose of Chris. And then I won't be seeing him for quite some time. Well, hopefully not that long. But I'm not too worried. There's always e-mail and the Internet and phones. Now, I can find the happy medium between holding on tightly and giving someone his space to breathe.

Yum, I love breathing.